Friday 22 June 2007

Exhibitionists

Had my mum over last weekend. She stayed Friday till Sunday. She lives three exits and a bus ride down the motorway away from us. We don't have a working car at the mo, so it's public transport for us. This means twenty quid in fares and a five hour round trip. So, we get more time together, obviously, if she stays over. This is her first visit in ages as we sort of fell out. Mother is one of these people who doesn't really understand home edding, or approve of it really - 'cos she doesn't want to/can't understand it - and is just a, ahem, stick in the mud. I think lots of home edders get this off family.

Anyway, I went on a mega cleaning up spree due to the impending royal visit (Kim and Aggie would have been well pleased). Mother is a minimalist (white walls and no dust) and I am an eco-friendly home edder, so there is no chance of me going down that route even if I wanted to. So, I have organised clutter.

Everything is hunky dory, all mega cobwebs hoovered away by the time we get Mother here (we went on the aforesaid public transport to bring her here as she would no doubt get lost making her way to hill billy land via the three buses required for this trip! We were all sorted and settled. Friday night...all cosy. I ask if she minds watching Junior while I nip up to the allotment to sort out some bits. (gives them a bit of Gran and Grandkid time together) "Yes, it's fine, you go" she says. She and Junior were all cosied up on the sofa awaiting the next instalment of Create and Craft, nibbles and orange juice at the ready.

Thirty minutes later, I gets back and find Junior rolling around, chuckling away and Mother with "that look", tut tutting, pointing towards the kitchen. With a heavy sigh and a "what now?" muttered under my breath I waddle over and peek in and find that my hedonistic pooches were erm, yes, bonking!!! And smiling!! Just my luck, innit? The weekend my Mother picks to stay is the one where both female pooches are on mega heat. It didn't stop at that, either. If it had been just me and Junior then I would have left the pooches to it but, no......I had to separate them as "it's not a nice thing for a kid to see" according to Mother. Well, anything for a quiet life, or so I thought. So, females in one room, male dog in another and off we all go to bed. Ten minutes later the whining starts....gets louder and louder..with the odd "shut up" in between. Well, actually, lots of "shut ups". Do they stop? Nah. Within half an hour Bobby dog was in full pelt...howling away at earplug volume. Mother and Junior didn't hear this due to their heads hitting pillow and then being out for the count. I am, however, still catching up on my sleep.

By the way, Bobby dog has been snipped, so there will be no patter of tiny paws, etc.



Bobby Dog and Cilla Black........THE CULPRITS!!!

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